Motherhood is a
Motherhood is a
A healthy pregnancy is rarer than you might think, and if you’re able to use your super power to help a hopeful family-to-be, you can bring home a life-changing amount of money in the process…
…$40,000 – $70,000 on average.
surrogates found their extra perfect journey with help from Surrogacy Is…
A surrogate advocate is a person or group who truly advocates for the brave, amazing moms who decide to become surrogates.
We take being surrogate advocates very seriously. Being a surrogate advocate isn’t a marketing gimmick. It’s not a side-hustle. It’s everything.
Surrogates, in our eyes, are the most important piece of this equation.
While most agencies say they “advocate” for the surrogate, do they really?
If you think about it, the perspective many agencies have comes down to human nature. Most agencies are intended parent focused, because that’s the ultimate client they’re designed to serve. And that’s okay! We serve intended parents, too!
After all, the purpose of a surrogacy agency is to help intended parents achieve their dream of having a baby, and we think that’s an absolutely noble purpose. It’s our purpose, too!
But far too often, the surrogate’s interests can be dismissed, so a true surrogate advocate helps balance that equation.
We’re not looking to tip the scales, just balance them.
No, we don’t think so. If someone truly advocates for surrogates, the interests and experience of the surrogate should be the mission of the company. Their organization should be surrogate focused first & foremost.
That doesn’t mean that intended parents aren’t a focus, as well. But it’s our philosophy that, a well-prepared, well-informed, well-supported surrogate is the cornerstone of the most successful surrogacy journeys.
How we serve intended parents is by taking great care of the surrogates who make the surrogacy journey possible.
And we’re not talking about creating surrogacy divas here. We’re talking about ensuring equal support, and mutual respect. We believe that, if the end goal is for the intended parent(s) to bring home their sweet baby, and for the surrogate (and her family) to have their lives changed in the most positive way, this is how it’s done.
Here’s what’s important to know about us. We’re surrogate advocates first. That’s how we started, and that’s what we’ll always be.
Every surrogate that goes through our process gets the following things that most (all?) agencies don’t offer:
- Choices between several other agencies
- A surrogate advocate who supports you through your journey 100% free
- Most surrogates who find us end up working with our amazing partner agencies. We think that’s great! No agency is a perfect choice 100% of the time, even us!
Most surrogacy agencies have long lists of intended parents waiting to be matched with their perfect surrogate. If an advocacy group is owned by an agency, it might be difficult for them to truly encourage any surrogate who enters their process to consider all of her options when they really want her to work with their agency—regardless of whether that’s the best fit for her.
By remaining independent, we don’t have any motivations to show a surrogate candidate one agency over another. We simply allow every surrogate to have options and make fully informed decisions on what’s best for her!
And here’s what’s important for you to know about working w/ Surrogacy Is… occasionally, we can be an “agency” option for you. What this means is, we can be an option for you to choose. But the choice is always yours. Whether we manage your journeys or one of your other agency choices, we know you’ll be in good hands.
And no matter what, you’ll always have a surrogate advocate in your corner. 100% free.
“OK, I know you’re surrogate advocates, but you said you can sometimes be an agency option for me, too? If you are surrogate advocates, how can you sometimes be an agency? Doesn’t that go against everything you just said?”
No, not at all. Actually, it’s quite the opposite.
We started off as surrogate advocates, and we’ll always be surrogate advocates first and foremost.
We’re not an agency that starts a “surrogate advocate group” as a marketing gimmick. If you’re already an agency, why not just advocate for surrogates as an agency, if you truly care about advocating for surrogates?
And there are agencies that truly do this for surrogates, don’t get us wrong. For example, the agencies we provide as options for you are agencies who truly advocate for surrogates.
So, if anything, we’re surrogate advocates that started an “agency” to better serve our surrogates. If we can be the best option and fit for what you need in your journey, then we may be an option for you as an “agency.”
You’ll always receive choices of the best agencies we can find, whether or not we’re on the list.
Can you see the difference?
So, if you haven’t yet, take our 8-minute quiz, then schedule a 1-on-1 call with a surrogate advocate (they’re experienced surrogates, too!) and they can walk you through what surrogacy could look like for you and your family!
(The content above has been updated to better fit our definition of what a surrogate advocate is. To see our original copy, click here.)
Kristina’s surrogacy story
Kids talk about surrogacy
Cheyenne’s surrogacy story
Morgan’s surrogacy story
Yamilet’s surrogacy story
Sunshine’s surrogacy story
Sam’s surrogacy story
Casey’s surrogacy story
The journey of surrogacy is an amazing, life-changing experience.
Moms get to help another family get started while bringing herself the opportunity to do the things she’s always dreamed of for her own family.
Every single woman who volunteers to take on this journey to help another family become whole, does so with lots of different ideas, expectations, and motivations.
Whether you’ve seen first-hand the struggles of infertility for someone you love and care about, or you are simply exploring the idea out of curiousity, it’s important that you are informed about the process, the risks, and the rewards of helping someone else in such a tremendous way.
As much as intended parents have ideas about who they want their surrogate to be, and how they imagine her lifestyle and values while caring for their unborn child, surrogates also have expectations and hopes for the type of family they want to share this journey with. It’s our goal to connect amazing moms with the right surrogacy agencies to bring their dream to life, too.
We believe with all our hearts that surrogacy is family, sisterhood, strength. Surrogacy is… Love.
We’re looking for unicorns like you
You may not realize it, but your body’s ability to create a healthy baby AND bring it into the world isn’t just amazing — it’s rare.
You may not have felt special as you struggled to see your feet and you stopped fitting into your bras, but we promise: you really are so, so freaking special.
And we need moms just like you to bring joy to a family in the making and to your family as well.
Take our short 8-minute quiz!
Check out more stories on Insta!
Take our short 8-minute quiz now.
Surrogacy is a process where a woman carries and delivers another person or couple’s child. This pregnancy happens through in vitro fertilization (IVF), which means this woman does not have any biological connection to the baby.
The surrogate is the ‘gestational carrier;’ this means she is providing the womb to carry the embryo for the Intended Parents (IP’s).
In surrogacy, there are Intended Parents, agencies, and surrogates.
The Intended Parents (IP’s) are the individuals looking to build their family or bring a baby into the world. The agencies work directly with the IP’s, helping them find the right surrogate candidates, coordinating with attorneys, helping with logistics (insurance, psychologists, contracts, etc.) and supporting them in the decision-making process. This way the IP’s can focus on developing a relationship with the surrogate! And the surrogates are the incredible mamas who help make it all happen!
We’re like your experienced surrogate best friend, who can guide you through this process… 100% free.
Throughout our first 3 years solely working w/ surrogates as advocates, we’ve realized something:
There aren’t as many agencies who truly advocate for surrogates as we’d like… trust us… we’ve searched. And searched. And searched.
So we decided to start one of our own.
Do we still offer surrogates a choice of other agencies to work with? Yes, every single time. But in some circumstances, we feel that we might also be a great fit to manage your surrogacy journey. When that’s the case, we’ll offer us as an agency choice, too. But no matter what, you choose the agency that’s best for you. Sometimes that’s us, sometimes it not.
There’s no one perfect agency, but we’re dedicated to help you find yours, and we’re happy either way, no matter who you choose.
We mean it when we say our #1 priority is for you to find your perfect agency.
We offer a quick (free!) quiz to help you see if you’d be a good candidate for surrogacy. Click here to take it now!
There are several requirements for surrogates (in order to protect the health of both the surrogate and the baby). You can find them on our requirements page.
Here are a few:
– having at least one successful, full-term pregnancy
– being within a recommended age range
– having a ‘healthy’ BMI
– free of tobacco and recreational drugs
– having a strong support system
To be honest, some of these requirements can be confusing (or, frankly, feel a bit limiting). So, once you take the quiz, if you have questions, feel free to reach out to us! We’d be happy to explain, provide clarity on your qualifications, or work with you on the next steps in your journey.
We put ‘healthy’ in quotes for a reason—because what’s considered ‘healthy’ is so different for each person! And, depending on a myriad of other factors, you may not need to fall exactly within this range.
However, a BMI between 18-32 is recommended because this is what is considered medically healthy for a surrogate undergoing IVF and other treatments along the journey.
A BMI that falls under the range may be too low for a safe pregnancy and delivery. It may also point to underlying health conditions for the surrogate. A higher BMI can impact the effectiveness of the IVF treatment, how your body responds to the medication, and ovarian function in general. A higher BMI can also lead to pregnancy and birth complications, too, which is why this requirement is set–not only for surrogates but at all fertility clinics.
In short, the BMI range is all about ensuring the healthiest pregnancy possible.
First of all congratulations! Only 4 out of 10 women who take the quiz meet all of the requirements, so it’s super rare to have both the heart and the health history to qualify as a surrogate!
The next step after passing our 8-minute quiz is to schedule a Q&A with one of our awesome surrogate advocates. They’re experienced surrogates, too! They’ll walk you through the whole process, help to build your profile, determine your ideal compensation, and match you with the best agency out there specifically to match your unique wants, needs, and personality.
Yes! You can become a surrogate if you’ve had tubal ligation.
Tubal ligation is a surgery that involves cutting and tying the fallopian tubes (which prevents an egg from entering the uterus or sperm from passing from the tube to the egg).
In surrogacy, pregnancy happens through IVF—where the fertilized egg/embryo is transferred directly to the uterus—which doesn’t involve the tubes at all! So, in short, you can still bring your IP’s baby into the world even after tubal ligation.
- Typical compensation packages for surrogacy consist of a base compensation ranging from $45,000 – $75,000, based on several factors plus additional payments for milestones leading up to and throughout the pregnancy, such as medication start, embryo transfer, maternity clothing at second trimester, and more.
- All expenses are paid for the surrogate to meet with the parents’ IVF doctor for an in-person medical evaluation. If travel is required, those expenses are paid for as well as a per diem for meals and expenses.
- Compensation and Benefit Packages typically start once legal contracts are signed and a trust account is fully funded with the entire surrogate compensation and expenses.
- Surrogates receive their base compensation in monthly installments throughout the pregnancy.
Read more about surrogacy compensation: https://surrogacy.is/compensation/
No, your eggs won’t be used in the surrogacy process.
There are two types of surrogacy—traditional and gestational—and with gestational surrogacy (the type of surrogacy we focus on!), the IP’s eggs and sperm will be used.
So, in short, the surrogate will not be biologically related to the baby at all.
Although it might seem strange that your significant other needs a background check, this is a requirement in place to protect all aspects and all individuals in the surrogacy journey.
A background check (both for the surrogate and her spouse) helps to ensure the safety of the environment for surrogate and baby during pregnancy and birth.
(Don’t worry, the Intended parents undergo a background check too!)
Yes, you can’t have more than 2 C-sections (or 3 with a clearance letter from your OB) or more than 6 live births.
There are a few required vaccinations for surrogacy: TDAP, Varicella (chickenpox immunity), MMR (measles, mumps, rubella). Others, for example flu and COVID are flexible.
Some IP’s may have specific requirements for their surrogate to ensure safety during pregnancy and delivery, or to match their lifestyle and values.
It’s best to first take our short quiz to see if you qualify as a surrogate candidate. When you take the quiz, you’ll be able to see and understand the basic requirements.
From there, we will connect with you to learn your goals, perspectives, and values—and connect you with an agency that honors your choices.
Typically, 21-40. We’ve had cases up to 45 get approved by an IVF clinic, but it’s rare.
Every prospective surrogate must be at least 21 years old before she can be approved for surrogacy. This minimum age requirement is set by the American Society for Reproductive Medicine, based on what experts have identified as the best indicators of success for a gestational carrier.
But most importantly age restrictions exist only to protect the surrogate and the baby’s health and give the best chance for successful outcomes!
For us to help you become a surrogate, you need to be a U.S. citizen or U.S. permanent resident.
Yes! You absolutely can be a single mom and a surrogate. You just need to make sure you have a good support system. You might need emotional support or potentially someone to be with your kids while you are attending appointments or delivering your intended parents’ magical, miracle baby.
No. All medical expenses are covered by insurance or the intended parents/agency. All expenses are paid for the surrogate to meet with the parents’ IVF doctor for an in-person medical evaluation. If travel is required, those expenses are paid for as well as a per diem for meals and expenses.
Also, before surrogate pregnancy, typical benefits & compensation can include:
- Monthly non-accountable allowance starting at $250+ per month throughout the journey
- Mock Cycle Fee starting at $500+
- Medication Start Fee starting at $500+
- Signing and other bonuses starting at $1000+
- Embryo Transfer Fee starting at $1000+
- Health Insurance Monthly Premium (actual cost)
- Legal Counsel (actual cost)
Parents that have decided to choose surrogacy have already been through a lot! The couples that I carried for had already fallen in love with the EMBRYOS before they transferred them to my uterus. They knew the sex of the future baby, and that they had all the normal chromosomes they should have. They knew for a decade before trying surrogacy that they would find a way to bring those embryos to life. And that’s the story of a lot of those couples. They have invested so much time, hope, tears, and resources to make it possible for their children to be born. They will never change their mind about it! But if they did (which they won’t!) there are fully enforceable legal contracts in place, as well as a fully funded trust account that has your entire compensation and medical expenses in it before you even begin IVF medications. The legal contract even has provisions in place for a next of kin, should anything happen to the parents before the baby is born, so there is someone ready and able to take them home and love them when they are born. When you get to the matching stage and hear the parent’s stories, you will see. Intended parents love their children just as much as we love our own.
A gestational surrogate becomes pregnant via IVF. The embryo is created in a lab, where the intended mother or donor egg is fertilized with the intended father or donor’s sperm. The embryo is then implanted into the surrogate’s uterus. With this method, the surrogate is not related to the baby. The majority of surrogacy arrangements are gestational these days.
At first glance, it would seem obvious that a surrogate would get attached to the child, right?!
But as a surrogate, you go into the process with eyes wide open to the fact that the child you are caring for is not your own.There is not that sense of yearning you have when you’re carrying your own child, wondering if it will have your eyes or your husband’s nose. You are not choosing the baby’s name. You’re not imagining all of the big moments the way you do with your own sweet babies!
You go into the pregnancy in a very non-romantic, science-based way, and you know that this kid’s parents loved her before she was ever conceived, and fought so hard to make her life a reality.
In fact, you probably will feel more attached to the intended parents, and not the baby.
Nope! We partner with agencies all over the US, who work with surrogates, intended parents, and hospitals all over the US.
If you prefer a local match or less travel, we will help you find agency options that meet your needs, but geography won’t hurt your ability to become a surrogate.
Once we review your agency options with you and you choose your ideal agency, you’ll complete their intake process until you’re cleared to match. There are a lot more intended parents than surrogates, so matching is usually fairly quick for surrogates. From the time you complete the intake process to match, it takes about 30 days on average.
💯 you do! We work hard to find you the right agency who has the type of intended parents you want to help. We have a great relationship with our agencies, and they know how important it is to us that they find you the intended parents you’re hoping for!
While there are very few companies who call themselves surrogate advocates, we’re definitely not all the same. For example, Surrogacy Is…❤️ is founded and privately owned by experienced surrogates whose singular focus is to advocate for other women entering this process, in the way we wish we’d had when we were starting out.
At Surrogacy is… being a surrogate advocate is not a “gimmick” or a sales pitch. It is in the DNA of each member of our organization, and our sole purpose for existing.
While there are others out there who call themselves “surrogate advocates” most are owned or funded by agencies whose interest is to recruit surrogates into their program, whether or not it’s the right and best fit for each surrogate.
But wait, didn’t I hear you say that you have an agency, too?
We’re a surrogate advocate group who created an agency to provide more choice to our surrogates. That’s very different than an agency who creates a “surrogate advocate” group to refer people to their agency.
So, it’s actually quite the opposite.
Take our short 8-minute quiz now.
Sunshine & Shelly
They’ve each been surrogates 3 times…
…and they’re going to walk you through the initial process to make sure your journey is a success.
Shelly is creative, ambitious, and next-level kind. She earned her Bachelor’s degree in Marketing at FIDM by 19, before becoming a mom and has had a thriving career in the fertility space. Her huge heart and advocacy for gay parents led her to become a surrogate for two sets of dads, a couple in Norway and another couple in LA.
Sunshine is fiercely independent, pragmatic and resourceful. As a teen mom, she earned her Bachelor’s degree in English Education from CSULB and went on to teach High School English, empowering students who needed to feel seen and heard by teaching them the art of written expression.
It was Shelly’s example that inspired Sunshine to go out on a limb and try something as “crazy” as surrogacy and it absolutely changed her life for the better.
Shelly and Sunshine have helped to bring seven babies into the world, completing four families, across three continents, not including their own!
Now they are using their voices to advocate for and support women in realizing their dreams of creating the most beautiful life they can for their families.